Chapter 44: Am I Your Pet Dog?

Lin Xi had lied.

In all the years she spent abroad, she could scarcely recall anything truly joyful. Even receiving the offer for her direct doctoral program, or winning competitions, didn’t bring her the happiness she had imagined. If she had to name one thing, it would be the recovery of her hearing.

But even that happiness was fleeting.

She got better, yet somehow never fully healed. Her soul remained trapped in the year before she left for another country, and by the time she arrived, she was nothing more than a numb shell, living her life by rote.

The only truly joyful memory she could savor again and again in recent years was that New Year’s Eve—after her follow-up exam, Qin Yu had gotten two VIP tickets to her favorite singer’s concert and took her to listen—

Yes, to listen.

She remembered it vividly. The doctor had told Qin Yu that her hearing was continuing to deteriorate. At first, she could still catch the faintest sounds, but things had worsened beyond expectation. In other words, soon she, half-deaf and almost mute, would no longer hear anything at all.

Before this, everyone had reassured her that the hearing loss was only temporary, and she’d recover soon enough. So when she overheard their conversation, it struck her like a bolt of lightning from a clear sky.

She should have been happy that day, looking forward to watching fireworks with Qin Yu that night. It was their first New Year’s Eve spent together, just the two of them.

But after leaving the hospital, she didn’t want to do anything. She was right back where she started.

Qin Yu sensed her gloom, and gently patted her head. “Why the long face again?”

She glanced up at him, then lowered her gaze, offering him no response.

Then, as if by magic, he produced two tickets and handed them to her. “Want to go to a concert?”

VIP seats.

Her favorite band.

She instantly felt her eyes sting. She had always disliked tears and never wanted to cry, yet she couldn’t hold them back.

He knew why she was crying. Usually so reticent, he said all manner of comforting things.

“I promise, Xi Xi, you’ll get better.”

She refused him many times, but in the end, he took her away, flying with her to the other side of their homeland just for that concert.

Only, when they entered, she stubbornly took off her hearing aids, trying to prove to him that without them, she truly couldn’t hear anything.

A steady hum buzzed in her ears, and she could barely make out the distant commotion—a drumbeat that pounded at her eardrums, leaving her uneasy.

Yet when she met his deep, entrancing gaze, her heart slowly calmed, as though a small boat, tossed in a raging sea, had finally found its harbor.

She didn’t know how long had passed when a new song began. It was her favorite.

She watched the lyrics on the screen: “Can’t hear, can’t hear my persistence, but my heart keeps thumping...”

She instinctively gripped his sleeve, her damp palm wrinkling his suit.

At that moment, he clasped her hand, his long, distinct fingers weaving through hers. While she was still stunned, he pulled her into his arms.

She rested against his chest, close to his jacket.

A rhythmic thumping sounded in her ears—deep and powerful, drowning out all other music in the venue, clear as day.

She looked up, bewildered. The stage lights flickered, casting shifting shadows across his face, making it impossible to read his expression.

Until he leaned down, his dark hair brushing her cheek, his warm breath falling against her ear, and a halting voice murmured, “Lin Xi, can you hear it?”

She didn’t understand.

It wasn’t until the concert ended, on their way back, that she realized what she had heard was not a drumbeat at all.

It was, besides his words, the only sound she heard clearly that night—his heart, racing as wildly as hers.

—

“As long as you’re happy.”

The voice so close pulled her abruptly back from her memories. Lin Xi blinked, and her eyes brimmed with tears.

Qin Yu, apparently satisfied with her answer, repeated softly, “As long as Xi Xi is happy.”

A sudden ache filled her eyes, her lips moving as she tried again and again to speak. “And if I’m not happy?”

“What if, all these years abroad, I haven’t been happy?”

The truth was, she hadn’t been happy.

No one really knew what the past few years had been like for her.

No—Qin Yu knew.

“You know, don’t you? You know I wasn’t happy then, do you?”

She kindly answered for him, “Qin Yu, you’ve always known.”

The man’s head hung low, his profile tinged with sorrow. He barely shook his head in response.

“I’m sorry.”

…

Time slipped by. Suddenly, Lin Xi stood up and crouched before him.

Her hands braced on his knees as she looked up at him.

“Qin Yu.” Her voice was gentle, soft as she called to him.

He froze, and, almost instinctively, lifted his numb hand from his knee, caressing her face as he had done so many times in the past, sinking into the illusion of her docile affection.

“Third Brother.”

The tenderness vanished, shattered by that unexpected address.

He had a premonition—now that she’d called him that, nothing good would follow. He leaned toward her, desperate to stop her.

But it was too late.

“Third Brother, am I just a pet you keep?”

Qin Yu’s eyes widened, his hand freezing in place.

She smiled up at him, the smile so blinding it made his heart ache.

Lin Xi rested her arms on his knees, truly resembling an obedient animal. “When you’re fond of me, you beckon; when you’re not, you tell me to go. Third Brother, am I just your dog?”

All these years, her smile was as innocent as ever—truly enough to drive someone mad. Of course, only if she kept silent.

In an instant, Qin Yu’s eyes reddened with pain. “Lin Xi, who taught you to say such things?”

His voice trembled with barely contained anger.

“My parents died young, my brother wasn’t with me. Everything I know now, didn’t you teach me yourself back then?”

“So, Third Brother, are you satisfied?”

Every word she spoke was a double-edged sword, wounding not only him but herself as well.

Qin Yu was hurting, but so was she.

Yet, inexplicably, there was a twisted satisfaction in her heart.

She wanted to see him lose control, to see him unravel.

Why should she be the only one to break?

Why, indeed?

“Say it again,” Qin Yu demanded, as if torturing himself, forcing her to repeat the words.

Lin Xi, not knowing which he wanted to hear, chose the cruelest. “Qin Yu, I’m the pet you—”

Before she could finish, a shadow fell across her, blocking the only light overhead. Qin Yu lowered his head and crushed her lips with a fierce, desperate kiss.